Thank you. I actually started a therapy which deals with emotional freedom technique 4 months ago. It wasn't even a relationship, but I got obsessed about her anyway. She was so closed of and didn't share much about her, which made it easy for me to develop a fantasy. And because I didn't know so much about her it was easy to maintain the fantasy. I didn't want to destroy the fantasy, so I always avoided telling her how I felt, so that I didn't get rejected at the beginning. But the school period ended, so we didn't see each other anymore. I finally e-mailed her and told her how I felt, but she was brutally honest as she told me that I was not important for her life and that I was making hate out of love by following her. When she said that I shouldn't write her anymore, I got angry and e-mailed her some really bad things. After that she said she wishes me all the best. As she seemed too much annoyed with me I didn't write her for seven years. I wrote her a couple of nice emails three years ago and got an email from her, in which she said that she was sorry and that she wasn't interested in me. She also said that she was not the person I imagined her to be. I knew that. I wanted to know more about her so that I couldn't imagine her the wrong way. In the same mail she told me that this was the last mail I would receive from her in my lifetime, which seemed to me really extreme. I felt deeply wounded by her. I also got conditioned to experience those emotional stabs, because I wanted to know why she behaved towards me like that. But then I stopped emailing her and googling her name and watching photos of her. Three years later I am terrified to look at the photo of her, as I am afraid that by doing that it would drag me to obsessive mode. It is better to write this down, to start speaking to others about this and leave her alone. Perhaps she will leave my mind by typing her out. It is time. As I am typing this I realize that she was really not a good girl for me, as I didn't deserve to be treated the way I was. I exaggerated in my previous post that I was sometimes so desperate that I would want any girl in my life, but I sometimes I lower my standards of what I want. I actually made standards for what type of girl I want in my life based on my fantasies about her. So, sometimes I need to lower my standards simply because I don't know how realistic my standards are. But sometimes I just wish to be with a good healthy girl, who would treat me nice and sometimes I am afraid that I would lose my mind over a girl and be blind to red flags.