StarPonys, I read the whole thing :-) But I was kind of stuck here:

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StarPonysMama said:
My ex and I have been kinda sorta seeing one another.

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Is he an ex or ain't he :-) If you're not totally together, he has his life and you have yours. You can hook up with him if that is what you want to do with your time/money/life but don't get to "control"/comment on what he does with his; he's a "free" man and if he wants to stand naked in the street and throw all his money up in the air for whoever wants it, he can do that? That's his choice.

If he's sneaky, that's his choice, his style; you can't do a whole lot about that. He can give his money to his ex and children, hire n'er do well assistants and foolishly give them his credit card. You can have an opinion but, as my stepmother use to say when I'd offer mine unsolicited, "Who asked you?" :-) What can you do? I think you'll get yourself eaten up on the inside from questioning stuff you can't control; you can only decide what you want to do, who you want to be with and have contact with, etc. not anyone else.