@MickeyCheeky and @Bill3 I do see a therapist and we've spent the past several sessions going over my feelings of guilt. I have gotten a handle on it, though I know I still have much work to do - nothing is solved over night. I worry about my son, but I know with the proper help from both sides, and also a family therapist to help, he can understand and hopefully thrive in a new family arrangement. This is where my guilt is stemming from, the hardship that my son will face. But I will work hard to make sure that I make him feel as loved and as cared for as he has been since he was born. I steadfastly believe that.