Honestly? It's been a mixed bag. I hate to say it, but I really understand why so many people with AsPD stop going to therapy or say that therapy doesn't do anything. It feels like it can take way too long for whoever I'm talking to to actually understand that I really mean what I'm saying. It took me forever for them to just acknowledge that I had problems with telling too many lies.

They also constantly forget that I don't really process emotion properly. They will try to make an appeal to my emotion and catch themselves in the middle of it a lot. Most of my significant breakthroughs have been through mysticism, not therapy. I really feel like they don't know how to treat what I'm going through most of the time.

However, instead of dropping out of my sessions, I stuck with them. Over time, the quality has gradually gotten a little better. There have been a handful of things that therapy has helped me process quicker, or things that my therapist has pointed out to me that might have taken me awhile to notice. I'm far from getting genuine help every session, but I feel like I'm at least helping my therapist better understand what I'm going through every session.

It also got me access to medication, and that helps with the homicidal ideation and misanthropy. I don't have to feel angry all the time anymore. That's really nice.

If my treatment wasn't practically free for me, and I wasn't already forcefully admitted for a good chunk of time, I wouldn't continue going. It's too hard to get over that lengthy introduction before I actually start getting some amount of help, and the help that I do receive isn't exactly high quality. Even then, the few times it's helped me have actually been instrumental in becoming more stable and being able to function, so I can't say that it's entirely useless. Just mostly.

I also say this after jumping between multiple psychiatrists, therapists, psychologists, etc. I've dropped countless therapists after just the first session. Just finding one that worked for me was a lot of effort, and arguably not worth it. I'm not sure that I would do it again with the pitiful returns I'm getting, especially if I had to pay full-price for my sessions and medication.

So, not a ringing endorsement, but it has helped in its own way.