My father was a violent man. He was very scary.

Once in awhile, he was funny and great fun!

As a child, I was very confused because he was my dad and I loved him; yet, he was an absolute terror, too.
I 'd spend time with him and I felt VERY GUILTY when I did not go with him during his visitation time. I have siblings and he had the right to see them, but he always wanted just one brother and me. Even though I could not stand all he would put us through (it was so traumatizing), I would worry about him and would be concerned as to whether or not he was okay (after my parents' divorce). This created many conflicts within myself, which, now looking back, was way too much for me to handle on my own.

I have memories come back to me, even after all of these years.

Not only did I have a bond with my dad, I had a very strong bond with my brother because we had survived so much together..