Needed to do some things today but couldn't get myself to leave my apartment. Every now and then I go through sort of an agoraphobic phase, this is just one of those times I guess. My anxiety is really bad lately. Might have to take my prn meds. The more I stay inside the more paranoid I get.

I see my therapist next week. I'm going to see if we can discuss ways to deal with OCD type problems, because she had mentioned in the recent past that I may also be dealing with some OCD. I have panic attacks and pure dread whenever I look at something and it's not a certain way or not as flawlessly clean as I like. I know that's not normal. And it happens every day several times a day. It's a horrible feeling. I get obsessed with certain thoughts that go through my head repeatedly that I can't get to stop. Then there's the intrusive thoughts and images, very disturbing ones.. Anyway. I need help learning how to deal with that, and may see about getting my Paxil switched to zoloft (which I've been on in the past) when I next see my psychiatrist because it seemed to work better for some of the anxiety stuff.