wow, such a lot going on in a time I would wish for you to be surrounded in love and peace. The mental health people can't help because so far he is not a danger to himself or others. I have little to offer in way of advice because it is a stuck place that only the 2 of you can find a way out of. I will tell you about my husband back 18-20 years ago, maybe it will help?

My spouse has always been fragile. In health due to a congenital heart issue finally corrected after 3 open hearts when they didn't know what they know now, and in mental health. He had a history of anxiety and depression before I met him. He has had several episodes since we have been together 25 years. What I have done, repeatedly early on was when he would get to a state of agitated depression, almost psychotic in the way he believed things that were not true and was NOT logical. I left him once when I was pregnant for first who is 23. I simply said I don't need what you are giving and I am going on my own. He came to me asking for togetherness. Later on when everything was my fault and I wasn't fair, was mean and didn't appreciate him I bent over backwards to help him and to be a better person because it must have been me right? It hit me like a lead balloon suddenly that it wasn't me. I told him as much and told him to leave, that I didn't need his crap. That night he had himself signed into a hospital's mental health unit. I had no idea where he was or if he was okay and I worried. A friend came from 250 miles and spent a week with me. He stayed for that long and we and the kids went to the hospital to see him. He was trying hard to make it and he came home. He was mostly well from there on with 4-5 episodes over the years. He has been on meds for a long time and needs quite a bit to stay even. He is a good guy who gets on my nerves.

I hope this helps some. I know it is difficult but it is very important to develop boundaries and stick to them. This may be easier to do when you are protecting your little girl from that influence. I hated that the most and yes, I do believe it hurt our children. I hope you can figure out what works for you. It doesn't help him to sit quietly and let him act out without taking his meds. He has to have a line drawn for him. No I will not tolerate,,,, This is what you need to do. You may have to get a legal separation order from an attorney to force him to leave until he is stable. Good luck.