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Old Apr 12, 2008, 03:08 PM
PhantomPhanGirl PhantomPhanGirl is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Apr 2008
Location: Virginia, U.S.
Posts: 6
Thank you so much, bebop, and marriedwithacause for replying to my post.

I know it's not really a huge deal, and as I've had these crushes for so long, I'm pretty much used to them, but I really wanted to explain my situation anyway to see if there were others out there who could relate to me, because I often feel somewhat isolated it. I mean, I have people I've told, like my best friends (thank goodness for them. My mom also knows =P She took it rather well. I'd think most parents would be concerned if their daughter liked men older than themselves.)

Anyway, in response both your comments:

I've spent a lot of time trying to pinpoint exactly what it is that I'm attracted to about these guys (hence the comparisons I made in the topic post) and if you include the female teacher, the one thing is that they're teachers. I don't know if there's something specific about teachers I like. Could be I'm attracted to the fact that they're more knowledgeable and wise than I am--I could learn things from them. Or maybe I just have a thing for authority figures in general. Who knows? ^^

I also, as you(marriedwithacause) suggested, considered what role my father might have played in this. My dad's always been in my life, pretty much. There were weeks when he'd go away on business when I was a child, but I think that's normal. My dad's also really affectionate, while my mom is not so much, and like most girls, I butt heads with my mom and generally get along well with my dad. Ever since 6th grade when he got a new job, he wasn't around as much as was with the previous job (for a few years in my childhood he actually even worked from home). I suppose you could draw a connection there, in that 6th grade is around when I first became interested in men and not boys, but I still think it's somewhat of a stretch, and probably unrelated.

Lastly, another thing I've considered:
I wonder if I have a commitment problem, or something against being in a relationship, because I'm not sure I can say completely honestly that I would even WANT a relationship with one of my teachers. As much as I may fantasize about it, when I think realistically that if any of them took an interest in me like that, I think I'd be more concerned than pleased. I mean, one time, there was a teacher I thought I had a crush on for a few days, but he was just like way too friendly/flirty, and I just got a creepy feeling about him, and I avoid him to this day.
So yeah, I wonder if I don't like teachers because I feel like they're safe? Maybe I like them BECAUSE there's a slim chance they'll like me back?

Anyway, thanks again for reading and replying. I really appreciate the time you've taken to respond.