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Originally Posted by Denise70
Ok so ill give u some clarity here. Just because i think he deserves to be happy dosent mean i plan on meddling. Or have an affair yes i do love him and sorry but those feelings. Will never go away for whatever reason its not meant to look up twin flames. Im a very spiritual person
My goal is not to tell him how i feel. When i do. Reach out but i think he deserves some underatanding and peace just like i do. Ive tried to ignore it. And its just made things worse with keeping things bottled up from guilt and. Feeling bad. I need clarity cause there is so many unknowns. That way i can have some peace im sorry if u dont understand but please try. U can pm me. I know the pain affairs cause but im hurting now. So there can be a middle ground if i reach out and step back. I wont be telling him how i feel and at the same time release some bottled feelings. Maybe he needs to hear what i need to say
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Hey, I do get it. I do understand that you're seriously hurting right now and wanting to talk to him.
I return to the story of my gf who DID have an affair. Now I know that's NOT your intention.
She, too, had bottled up feelings she wanted to express to this married man. She too resisted and did NOT want to have an affair or meddle in his marriage.
She, too, felt the same exact way as you right now.
She tried to stay away from him by NOT being in touch with him, yet she had already fallen for him and they had already crossed the line once.
Well, she eventually caved and contacted him. She told him that he deserves to be happy (he claimed to be VERY unhappy in his marriage). She told him that she wants to be with him, but that she DID NOT want to have an affair.
Well, what happened? He pursued her even further!
He didn't care about not having an affair.. he wanted one, and she, because she was SO in love with him, ended up NOT being able to resist his advances. So they got together.
And this was ALL the result of her reaching out to him to "talk", to unload and tell him he deserves to be happy.
What happened next? They had an affair for a month or two until she pushed him to get a divorce. And when push came to shove, he couldn't go through with a divorce, and she ended up being completely heartbroken. It messed with her head for a VERY long time afterwards. She still hoped he would leave her, and he never did.
She felt VERY used and thrown out, as a result, and that hurt her beyond belief for a very long time.
So, just be VERY careful.
You are in a VERY vulnerable spot right now because you DO love him. And he COULD end up pursuing you further.... he already has pursued you, which you told us about before.
If you really DO NOT want an affair, you're going to have to be VERY strong IF he does pursue you again after reaching out to him.
Just be aware of the door that this COULD OPEN.
Married men who want an affair or sex will honestly stop at NOTHING to get what they want. And they will SAY ANYTHING necessary to get what they want from a woman.. including taking advantage of her vulnerability and love for him. Just be aware that men who want sex will tell lies in order to get it. This man told my gf that he WOULD leave his wife for her.... then didn't.
So be very very careful.
I still stand by my original advice: to NOT contact him. But you're going to do whatever you feel is best for yourself.
Hugs to you. I do feel for you, even if it seems I don't. Because my gf was in a similar spot as you, I have sympathy.
PS. I know what twin flames are. My gf said that this married man was HER twin flame too. Know and understand that the law of twin flames is that they go through MANY lifetimes of not being able to be together until finally, once they've BOTH learned ALL soul lessons necessary, they are able to finally be together.