I'd have to agree here...you seriously need some marriage counseling. It doesn't matter who's fault it is--sometimes you need a little extra help in certain areas.

This isn't a blaming game...it's about a relationship that you appear to be quite committed to is falling apart. Have you asked her to do a little here or there or asked for her help in doing something (even if it's as simple as doing the dishes or helping with the laundry)???? I think that would be a good place to start...it also helps get some quality time in while getting stuff done.