This morning I was woken up by a 6 am storm right overhead my flat. It was wonderful. I love non-destructive storms. The sound of thunder must be one of my favourite sounds in the world.

Yesterday I saw my T. He agreed with my pdoc that my recent violent outburst was PTSD related and that I’ve been Bipolar symptom free for a year now. Finally got my meds right. I also had to see my sports doctor twice to get different treatments. It was a busy day following my first day at university. This caused the Fibromyalgia to flare bad. Overwhelmed and exhausted I took Seroquel and went to bed at 8 pm.

My T thinks it will take a week or so for me to calm down properly after my explosion last weekend. I still feel fragile and irritable, but can easily laugh if I hear/see funny things. So thankfully I’m not depressed, just stressed to my limit. I asked my how I can prevent another dangerous explosion of rage at the level I had on the weekend and he assured me I am doing all the right things, and that what happened was an unusual set of circumstances. He said that ‘the stars aligned’ on Sunday in a way that’s impossible to predict. Basically, a series of events occurred that led to me snapping and they could not be predicted.

The exhaustion is a worry as I need to study today, do a food shop, and have University tomorrow. My next rest day is Saturday. I will try and push through, take regular breaks, and keep a positive attitude. The hip treatment is also taking up my time but hopefully it will speed up my recovery. It has been a year now. The doctor feels confident that with the increased treatment I will recover. The other problem is the expense. Thankfully I have a little savings and if the hip is better by the end of semester in June I will begin looking for work.