I think you’re rationalizing his behavior by trying to point out a positive, ie, that he’s a great father. When in reality, he’s abusing YOU and is a very poor example for the kids to follow.

Why are you trying to hold on so hard to someone who abuses you? What good can possibly come from abuse? You’re getting harmed, and therefore, so are your children who are witnessing mom being abused by this monster. And yes, he’s a monster. Any man who hits a woman is. And you’re accepting his behavior. By staying, you’re giving him the message that it’s acceptable behavior.