Hi @Bill3


Sure I'd love for you to pray along with me. That has been my constant prayer lately.


The support group was okay. There's one guy there who has Schizoaffective disorder like me. I think maybe we could be friends outside of the group. I'm having trouble connecting with some of the others, but it's only the second time I went. I noticed some people had been there the first time I was there and other people hadn't. I didn't get to talk very much in group but I made the effort and I went and I talked at the beginning and the end. There was one really chatty person there who kept sort of interring with what people were trying to say and the facilitator didn't seem to know what really to do about her. So she rambled on for quite a while in the middle of other people trying to share their stories. My parents might go to the family group next time. So they can get support as they support me. I think that might be good for them. I don't know. They'd have to try it. They both said they were willing to try it but not last night because they were both tired. It is a long group, about 2 hours with a 10 minute break in between.


I'm having urges today to SH. Not terrible ones, but still disruptive. No T appointments this week so that may not have helped. I was supposed to see my Pastor T early in the week but he was sick. It's been 34 days since I SH-ed. Today I keep thinking about the hospital and my time there and all the stuff that transpired. Sometimes I feel like I need to go back to the hospital. Other times I feel okay. I have to do an evaluation next time with my case manager. I enjoy talking with her but I'm afraid she is going to tell me I am functioning well enough now and don't need her anymore. It could just be my fear of that.


All I want to do is sleep. I don't know if it is the medication or if it is just me, or if it is the depression. Right now I wish I was sleeping. Sleeping is less painful than being awake. Sad but true.


How are you doing Bill? You doing okay? Thanks for always being such a great support. HUGS Kit