Hugs to you, RB. I was going through something almost exactly like that recently. I had a guy, who insisted that I was his GF because I was kind and a good listener for him. He kept demanding more and more and would make the wild, uncontrollable rants and threats to harm himself if I didn't comply. I was an emotional hostage for many months, feeling like I was the one responsible for his well being and his safety. Mine was abusive too. I finally had to cut ties and let nature take its course, which is very difficult for me. I frequently worry about his safety even now as it's been three days since I heard from him and his parents have no idea where he is. But, I think you have to get to the point where you understand that he will do what he is going to do and it's his responsibility, not yours. I know it's not easy, trust me.

I am pulling for you to get through this. I am where you're at and it's exhausting.