Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006
I know I'm late to the party but thought I'd add my 2c here. I think part of the difficulty is that in what you refer to as a toxic relationship I would call it a dysfunctional one. I think that stating it as a toxic relationship typically implies that you're with someone toxic for some reason thus placing the entire toxicity on them and none of it on ourselves. The fact is dysfunctional relationships are not void of our own input into the toxicity or at the very least the enabling of such bad behavior in others.
No matter how you will rationalize that they (the other person) was/is wrong and behaving badly, they have an usually continue to - give us something whether intentionally or not. if there was absolutely nothing in it that we gain by sticking around there would be very little difficulty leaving. Mind you what we get from it, from them, may not even be healthy or good for us (which is the most likely case) but somehow they feed or give something to us that we either subconsciously or consciously need. There is always a magnetism or draw of some kind and I think this is fundamental to why it is difficult to leave.
I hope that this simplistic explanation is not going to be taken as if it's the entire answer or that I think that's all it is. nor do I think it invalidates what others have said but I do think it's worth considering along with other answers.
|
I agree with some of what you stated and put forth here. I agree it sometimes takes two to tango. And I agree that people still may get something out of the unhealthy relationship and therefore have difficulty leaving.
I disagree with the use or replacement of toxic with dysfunctional. There are defined toxic personality types, defined and characterized by many different psychologists. So there is such a thing as a toxic person and subsequently a toxic relationship. There’s numerous articles all over the web defining toxic relationships, just as there are that define toxic personalities.
A non toxic person can become involved with a toxic personality who infects their relationship with their poison. And yes, as a result, the relationship is dysfunctional. The only blame that can be placed on the non toxic person is staying in a toxic/unhealthy relationship dynamic.
So there is such a thing as a toxic person and a toxic relationship. Look it up online. Toxic personality, characteristics, toxic people and toxic relationships. There’s tons of material available online on this topic.
Toxic is defined as someone who effects our mental health negatively, simply put.