OlivierB, of course you deserve to live! And we all want you here.

It sounds very scary what you are going through. Is there someone that you can tell about these voices? Your doctor? Or at this time, even just a close family member or friend? Can you call someone right now? I know it must be getting a little late in the evening in Spain, but it's not too late.

The coronavirus is scary. Many in my country, the US, are getting more and more concerned. My sister in law in Czech Republic is getting concerned because there are coronavirus cases, there, too. But we can get past this with the proper precautions. We are strong and can fight off the virus. You can even tell the harassing voices that they have no match against you.