Quote:
Originally Posted by bluebicycle
I don't want to seek admission. I just seek relief, and I'm not getting that from anybody. They just don't give a **** about how I feel or what I'm going through.
I have my therapist appointment tomorrow, but I'm wondering if I should even go. She is just going to piss me off even more and I don't want to get violent or verbally abusive. I already want to call her a ******* **** ******, a *****, etc. to her face.
I am ******* done with her. I don't need a "provider" who doesn't give a ****. I even called the front desk to see if she was in today, and they said she's been in all week.
I will probably blow up on her if I go to my therapy appointment tomorrow.
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I know what you don't want. It makes sense, but it doesn't at the same time. You're projecting onto them more than owning your own behavior and ensuring you get help. Your words here are not true to the essence of your being. This is not you Blue.
I hope you can listen to what WC said recently. Your friends who love you are doing their best to help.
Your providers are not ultimately responsible for your health. You are. You have to seek new providers when you aren't getting the help you need in the time frame you need it. Your rage keeps escalating here. I agree you might do something extreme if you see your providers, but you need help. Why are you stuck on them being the only answer and simultaneously stating you know they do not care and will not help? It is a loop of thought with no solution. You need a solution. What other paths for help can you see?
Can a friend call on your behalf?
Is it now worth a longer drive to get to an urgent care clinic?
Have you researched reaching out to one of the crisis lines?