What I like about this video is that he talks about how that being manipulated requires us to need others approval. If we love ourselves in a healthy way, we will eventually figure out how to have proper boundaries or walk away.



I also think some males can be more aggressive and competitive than some females; perhaps it is both a cultural and innate thing. Also, many people can be a bit narcissistic without being a full blown narcissist--my POV is that in many jobs in our culture, if you aren't a bit narcissistic, you are unlikely to succeed. Some people use manipulation as a tool and when it doesn't work they use other techniques. Some of us have to educate ourselves to not to be suckers (not saying you are but I know there have been times that I have been a total sucker to manipulation).

Anyways, my advice is learn to have kind but firm boundaries and when things don't feel right between you and your husband, tell him that you need time to yourself, that you won't allow him to talk to you like that, etc. He might be upset when you say it but if he loves you than he will accept your boundaries once he gets used to them. Good luck with your confusion from someone who has spent much of her life in confusion.