I love you bring up the topic about age. You showed lots of compassion so, I take my hat off in front of you.
I sometimes forget this perspective and find difficult to put on elderly people’s shoes. They went through not only physical but mental changes and the way many times, we saw them from the outside.

Said that, I agree with what it has been already said. I sort of think your mother is as she is, independently of her age. Maybe with age, her traits were reinforced or she didn’t learnt much. Aging has the good side that in spite of you loosing some skills, this is counteracted by wisdom and personal development.

Questions for answer yourself.
If you compare your mum’s relation with you in the past and now? Is there a meaningful difference?
Have your relative ( this case, your mother) went through a relevant change that could imply hin/her acting in a different way?

I have assumed recently that my mother and I don’t understand each other. We are very different in relevant stuff for me, so I don’t find this closeness I felt in the past. There was a big change in her life. It gave her the possibility to be more her and we are incompatible. So my relation with her is pretty much as a superficial one now.

I don’t think I have given any response. Only wanted to express how much I understand your feelings and worries.