I've had an eating disorder for twelve years, and have been in therapy for ten of them but have never done a more intensive eating disorder program. I finally tried and I had my eval and labs done, and all was good except for a low phosphorus level. Because of this, they will not admit me to the program. They didn't offer a higher level of care, which I'm assuming is because other than the phosphorus level I don't meet requirements. They said to raise the level and come back. I'm in touch with my PCP regarding that and am waiting to hear back, but I am really struggling with the decision from the treatment team.

I do get it; you can be "too sick" or "not sick enough" for certain levels of care, especially in the US' insurance-driven healthcare system, but to finally reach out and be denied for something that seems relatively small is really disheartening. We were sure I'd be a good fit until the labs came back, so I changed my work schedule and everything, which was really hard to do. I worry that if I can't be admitted in the next week or so, I will lose motivation again and just not bother. It's not what I want to do, but I can see it going in that direction.

This is just so hard. I hate my eating disorder. I guess having some perspectives or experiences from others could help, which is why I'm posting here. I feel really alone and hopeless right now.