Quote:
Originally Posted by ZazaJ
OMG, Seesaw, you perfectly described my husband! The clutter, the things done in a "wrong" way, the changes in plans - these are all his triggers. And it gets much worse when he's tired, stressed or not slept enough. How do you work around it, so that you don't rearrange your whole life to fit into his requirements? or do you have to in order for it to work?
|
It was brave of you to discuss with him, and you did it very gently, which is good.
My husband used to say he wanted me to do all the household work how he likes it. I would wash, fold, and put away HIS laundry, for example. Then he would say it wasn’t folded to perfection. What did I do? I told him he’s damn fortunate I do his laundry at all and if he wants it folded perfectly, he can redo it himself. He even said he was upset with me because I don’t put the silverware back in the drawer perfectly aligned. I will not change because of his neurosis. The silverware is clean and in the drawer.
When my kids were little, I made sure to not let them get neurotic. For example, I’d often cut their sandwiches different ways, so they didn’t get demanding that it would have to be cut only one certain way.
When he is being so ‘helpful’ about stopping you from eating desserts, tell him to do what he wants and let you be you. Maybe you won’t lose weight so quickly. It’s all at your own pace. He’ll just have to accept that and he is not really being helpful, he’s being your diet enforcer, and nobody appreciates that.
