Aw, I'm real sorry you're going through this with your husband right now, very heartbreaking. I can definitely understand all those feelings you listed. But I haven't been in a relationship for years so I don''t feel I should be handing out relationship advice at this stage - but someone here is bound to come along very soon with some experience and wisdom to help you, Catie96.

Don't you worry - there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there. ((hugs))