Why cant your husband go collect the set of crystal and bring it home? Then he will not feel he needs to help her.. Is he worried she will break it or something?

As for her not including you in the good wishes?? Just let that go, no need to overthink that, spare yourself the nonsense/drama ..it does not matter in the big picture.

My husband and I do have to deal with his Ex because he has 3 sons.. they are all grown now but there are still times they need to talk about the boys. Same as I still have to talk to my EX about our daughter who is also grown. But if there is no children from that marriage why is your husband helping her with things ??? she could have someone else do? she could hire someone to come fix her tv situation..