(((((mandazzle)))))
this brought back alot of feelings and memories...your relationship with your mum sounds very smilar to the way mine was. But I am pleased to say that now, having my own children and having been through so much with them, we actually have a fairly well-functioning relationship (on a superficial level at least lol). I gotta admit that the best thing towards this was leaving home, but not til after school when i went away to uni. I had plans to run away but in retrospect that would not have helped. IMO you are lucky your mum knows a bit about your struggles; while she may not seem supportive at least she is doing things to help (e.g. looking for a t for you)- my mother only found out about my SI 4yrs ago and even on Sat night asked if I had had any 'relapses' (I have never stopped, I just don't have THAT much of an open relationship with her!).
Sorry for rambling so much, what I most wanted to say is that I understand, I remember the hurt and pain you appear to have now, and I hope that with all your supports things will be ok for you