Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes
Please learn that when someone is drowning in their mental illness issues like this, it's like trying to rescue someone from drowning, they can literally pull you under and drown you while thrashing around.
You are simply not qualified to handle this challenge. It's not a way to try and make up for how you were in your past either. You are not being mean by cutting him off either. It doesn't matter what he says either, he is a very mentally ill individual, he is clearly drowning and dangerous and extremely destructive.
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I know! I'm really having to fight my nurturing instinct on this. In 99% of all of my other social interactions, I go to help, it gets better, and then that person reciprocates at some point so my reaction is healthy and positive.
What you described is exactly what it feels like and what I told my counselor this past weekend. I even told his therapist the same thing and how I'm not qualified to help him through this. When I told him that, he said his usual, "You're the only one who can help me. You. It has to be you!"
I'm at 84 hours and holding. It's getting better. It has to be a thing, but I initially found a void in my life without the drama. I suspect this is what abused spouses go through.