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sarahsweets · Mar 25, 2020 at 03:51 AM

Hey @random1human does this make you happy?

Quote:

Originally Posted by random1human

I make porn. sounds great . I'm open sexually and such until you realize i am an 18-year-old high school senior who lives with my parents who DEFINITELY wouldn't approve. I love doing it (porn, not sex or anything. I'm a virgin, ill get to that later) I love the attention and the adoring viewers and watching the views go up. it consumes my day. I am getting better each time I start again ( this is the 3rd time), getting better at balancing life and porn, better at hiding it from my mom who would seriously hurt me if she found out.

Would your mom be upset like any mother would be? I would be upset if my teenage daughter or 20 year old daughter made porn simply because I wouldnt want them to be an object that someone can just google up to watch and do whatever they want an use my daughters for it. Or do you mean your mom is always abusive and this is another thing that would make her abusive? What do you mean by hurting you? Do you mean physically abusing you? I do not think you are ugly but you obviously think you are ugly. And when we think we are ugly we care less about what other people do to us or use us for because we think we are so ugly we dont deserve anything better. Is that how you feel? I know you are technically adult but they have proven over and over that the adolescent brain does not finish developing until your 20's. That means the decision making parts of your brain are not that of an adults. Is this something you want to pursue as a career or make money from?

like I said. I've never had sex. my videos are me alone. I am ugly and obese so I couldn't get a guy IRL if I wanted to. I'm kind of worried about how I will act in an actual relationship. I struggle with physical contact yet I am a very sexual person so I feel like I would be leading them on only to back out at the last second out of fear since I am basically all talk and i am 10x more smooth online than I am irl.

it could get me into awkward situations. someone could find out and that terrifies me. so many bad possibilities yet I still long to continue.

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