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Originally Posted by eclairparty98
Hello  I would like to wish wellness and peace and love for each of you and your loved ones during this uncertain and scary time for us all - please be safe , pray for the world and the people on it, all my love 
I've not left my home for 2 weeks now since my country is on lockdown and I separated from my boyfriend of one year earlier today.
Shout out to everyone who supported me on my posts about my boyfriend last year!! Sending my love !!  
I'm sad for us both. I should be happy to be free from his bullying and abuse but I'm mourning the good times and pondering on what could have been  I'll never see him again.. be intimate with him again.. what will become of our happier memories together, what do they mean now?
Although he made me feel so insecure from the very begining one year ago , I sometimes feel I was lucky to have been with someone who stayed with me despite my flaws. Yet I'm hurt how any connection we might've had was tarnished by his cruelty so for that I'm grateful to have this chance to move forward.. hooray for new beginnings!! Upsides upsides ..
Being confined to my house for the next 2 weeks feeling this way.. I'm scared. Putting aside the more blatant fear of this virus.. I wonder how I can get through this break up in the best healthiest way?? Anyone who has gotten through a tough break up, I would be ever grateful knowing how.. and how I can apply it to these quarantined limits!! 
Also.. what are you doing to keep yourself happy and motivated during these times??
Thank you |
It's a difficult time right now all around, and to deal with a breakup on top of social isolation/social distancing, I feel for you.
Naturally, you're going to have all the thoughts you're currently having - nostalgia over the good times and the what if's, coupled by the realities of the dark sides.
Good for you for cutting the chord! Keep it that way, for sure.
If you ever have doubts, a suggestion is to make a negatives list for yourself and list out every cruel thing he's ever said to you, along with anything mean/abusive/toxic he did that made you feel unworthy, insecure and terrible about yourself. Then when you're missing him or feeling lonely, refer to this list and it will be a very clear, black and white reminder of ALL the reasons why you left.
I did this list for someone who abused me and I had a list of 72 items!!!!!! It REALLY helped me to get over him very quickly. I read it every single day and every single time I felt regret over the breakup. I knew I had done the right thing for myself, each time I read my list. It was very reaffirming.
Everyone here has great advice for you. Now it's YOU time. Find things to occupy yourself with, do anything that is enjoyable to you that is within your means, and think about how you are now FREE from cruelty. You can still call and face time with friends and family, so do reach out to those who can nurture and support you. Most importantly, nurture yourself and be kind to yourself.