A combination for me. The pandemic amplifies my original fears/issues. For example: homelessness. I was already terrified of becoming homeless again. Now with the pandemic, H not having a job, and partially financially supporting my sister and my mother in law, our money is going fast. We might come out of this alive, but with nothing to support ourselves with. Also, being physically away from L, and my family depending on me more emotionally, makes me feel more fragile. Anything and everything overwhelms me. Most of our session is based on how I can survive days without sessions.
Eta: L and I came up with a plan to help me through. In order for me to cut down on how often and how much I email, she sends me once a day, an email, that reassures me she's there, not going to leave, will be through this with me, and (now) that she's okay. Waiting for these emails helps me concentrate on her and our relationship instead of my thoughts.
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"Odium became your opium..." ~Epica
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