I don't know what CFS is and of course I am newly diagnosed with asthma. But, you know, my lungs and bronchial tubes are...compromised. I didn't want to talk too much about it but Covid 19 scares me. It destroys lung tissue. It's horrible. When I think about that aspect...I feel okay just freaking sheltering in place.

Living in a tiny apartment is hell on earth. After divorce I went from a large house with land, to a large rental house, to a townhouse, then an apartment with just a porch, and now a studio apartment. It's the kind of place you don't want to hang around in. I mean everyone who comes in says its cozy...but damn, space is life to me and this is like death. But if you can go out often then it is manageable.

I was already pretty depressed before Covid 19 hit. Well, severely depressed, treatment resistant, suicidally depressed. Now it seems like there's really no time to be depressed. I need a plan. I need a plan.