I don't know how H deals with me. He can't leave anywhere without worrying about my safety if I'm alone, rightfully so. Even when not depressed. Yet in public I'm glued to his side and wont leave the house without someone. The only time I'm "alone" is in therapy and the therapists office. So either way I'm ****ed. Is there a fast acting AP I can take when alone? I have no access to object I'd use for SH.

I haven't been outside for about 3 weeks. This is going to be so much worse when this ends. I haven't been doing well with self care. I'm not depressed but I've been crying at night. I think I might have a problem taking ambien to often to avoid my mood drop at night. I'm not sleeping without it.

I know I need to go into more detail about what exactly happens with my T when I'm alone but I don't know how she can help. Pdoc has no idea this is a problem. If anyone get sick I'm screwed. Isolation of either of us will be beyond hard.