Yeah, it's the story of my life. My older sister screams and curses and hit me several times as an adult. If I react or express a bad opinion of her she claims to be abused.

Recently, I confronted her about going around screaming profanities day and night, always yelling loud enough to be heard from my bedroom or if I'm outside. She said that she swears to vent because she is abused and forced to walk on eggshells all the time. Her idea of walking on eggshells is screaming "F****** s***" all day, slamming doors and kicking and throwing thing. I don't think there are eggshells left anymore.

I agree that it's unfair to call reactions to abusers a kind of abuse. It's just how normal people respond to abuse. I wish there was a way to shut up all those abusers and narcissists who claim to be victims because others disapprove of their behavior.