Hello Letsgetthisbread: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.

You wrote you don't quite qualify as an adult. So I presume you are a teen? I'm sorry you are in such a difficult situation. Perhaps other PC members will have some suggestions they can offer. However, from my perspective, I doubt there may be anything you can do regarding your mother's drinking & suicide threats. It's really up to your dad to do whatever can be done. But honestly as our host Dr. John Grohol, Psy.D. has written: "Denial is a Powerful Impediment to Treatment". Here's a link to that article from Psych Central's archives:

Denial is a Powerful Impediment to Treatment

From my perspective, the best (& perhaps only) thing you can do may be to do what you can to take care of yourself. Perhaps begin seeing a mental health therapist if you can to work through what you are experiencing. (If you're in school perhaps start by talking with a school counselor if there is one.)

What you are experiencing is something that is likely to follow you well into adulthood in one way or another. And the sooner you begin to address it the better. Here are links to 3 additional articles from PC's archives. The first is on being the adult child of an alcoholic. And the remaining 2 discuss dealing with toxic parents & coping when you're stuck at home with a difficult family member:

You Don't Outgrow the Effects of an Alcoholic Parent | Happily Imperfect

10 Tips for Dealing with your Toxic Parents | Happily Imperfect

How to Cope When You're Stuck at Home with a Difficult Family Member | Happily Imperfect

My best wishes to you. I hope you find PC to be of benefit.