He's a lot like his dad who grew up with trauma of his own. And although they were very supportive parents, I do believe his dad's past had an effect on all their children indirectly. I don't believe his dad was abusive or suffered a personality disorder.. although his jokes, too, are very dark and hurtful to others. They're a lot alike.

My partner also has MS. He's had MS throughout our entire relationship. Years before me he was a functional drug addict. He was charged with a $XXk theft. I didn't want to judge his past because he no longer was a drug addict (still to this day).. but when he shared with me his story, he was more concerned about my opinion of him. He has codependency issues (like his dad) and losing me over it was scary for him. I can't say he had any remorse over the victim, though. He said she wasn't very nice and said other negative things about her. Anyway, my point being.. I sometimes wonder if his personality issues is due to his MS (the yearly new lesions in the brain that could be altering his behaviours). But then he says he used to make his teachers cry in elementary school.. etc. So it's hard for me to think MS has anything to do with it, either.. or maybe a joint issue?

It's a puzzle I feel I need to solve in order to find peace within myself.. like I did with my NPD mother. If it can rid of my anger towards him, I can cope through whatever better..?