thanks Wild Coyote.
I am sorry for your losses in the past and that in the now situation may not be ideal but I am a strong believer even if I forget, that things work out some how, some way and hope for the best.

The first month with a 2 month old pup was a little tough but I think it was worth it for sure. I am glad pup (she) has settled down a lot, but she is still a puppy for sure.
I had signed up for some puppy classes but due to covid19 they are pushed back till at least May, which pup will be too old for the ones I signed up for, and I'm hoping they can put us in another class.in the meantime I've been reading, watching videos and training pup myself as best as I can. Pup amazes me on how smart she is.

I had been wondering if I could teach her to help me with my anxiety, I know that to have a service dog they need the right temperament and intelligence & training,
which I'm not sure if pup is the right fit or if my budget is. ((she's a pup so she still gets nippy and we are working on that)).there was one day I remembered an article about when your having nervousness ticks to give pup a treat, teach them to nudge, orpaws on , etc... I have issues with what my nervous signs are, but I had started crying as I was overwhelmed with thoughts one morning, and some how I remembered the article and tried it.. she let me pet her and she put her paws on my leg and stayed with me as I gave her treats and was crying... none the less she was a great deal of help to push negative thoughts aside to focus on her.
I think it will be a while with training and her growing up with some things. Even if she is "just a pet" she will be my "pet" that will probably help me out like my cat does ((no joke on that, my cat has helped me for years but pup is more attention grabbing so to speak)).

She's a sweet dog already. She has been a lot of work, but good work for me. I hope I've been on the right track with her but I guess time will tell.