I’ve read more about sex addiction and neglect and abuse.
Found my mum emotionally neglected me in every way really.
If I moved (which I can’t afford to do realistically, but would love to) I’d cut myself off from everyone as I also can’t drive. Which is another annoyance of mine as I was told by my mum dad and bro that they would buy my provisional for my bday two yrs ago. I got it this year after they had the form and everything all right this time.
Just do my mum could get hers first... do a few lessons as well. Only after I told her my fella let me drive the courtesy car and I did really well. Even in high heels.
She always has to talk about herself and then one up me on everything I tell her I’ve done. Like the garden... oh we’ve done a ton past 3/4 days. Arguments along the way. She has to come drop off Easter eggs for us and gets my son more than I have got him.
But she’s still done more in her garden than we have. And has had bigger problems with stuff than ours.
She’s just so selfish.
As is my fella. Im in the bath and he asks me to open a window. In a storm... btw. He’s been ****ing about all day and moaning and sighing at me when I want to do something or not do something and chill or have a new idea about how to organise the garden.
I’m fed up of the sighing. He knows I am. I’m beginning to this he’s a narcissist but I don’t know what’s the difference with that and an addict We know he is.
I don’t know what to do.
I want a happy relationship but I can’t have porn in my life anymore. The mention of porn is just a trigger for me. Or addict. Bathroom window. Ffs. I’m fed up of being stuck in this phase of betrayal trauma. I just want to move on from this but he keeps saying the wrong stuff. And he’s emotionally neglecting me and my son. I just want him to grow up. And not be an addict. But I don’t know If I can not hate him for it for the rest of our lives. If we stay together.