A label doesn't matter. If you can't stand what the personality is doing to your life then THAT is what needs to determine what YOUR choices are with YOUR life.
I had no idea what was going on with my now EX- H. All I knew at the time was that it got so bad & at that time I had no way out other than for me to die. I didn't & finally 13 years later I had my escape.
When I was finally out of that environment I could look back & say "what had I been dealing with?" I needed to understand. I went through different diagnosis & nothing quite fit. Always that.....but this isn't like that diagnosis. I finally researched ASD & it fit everything. Spectrum conditions are not easy to pinpoint because for everyone it is always a bit different.
Honestly I left him because it was about keeping my sanity & it didn't matter what diagnosis he fit or not. Finding that out was more about me knowing & recognizing what I had been dealing with so I never made the mistake I made again of getting into a relationship with someone like him.
It is really all about what YOU can tolerate living around or not. Your list of behaviors is very close to what my list was.