These past few months I've had a really bad mixed episode. In the end it became unmanageable. I couldn't function at all anymore and I was quite suicidal. The lack of help due to covid-19 made it worse. Luckily my Pdoc was there and gave me Seroquel in addition to my Lithium (which probably wasn't at the right dosage yet either but should be now).


The meds work to the extent that they make the situation less overwhelming, but I feel like they are only suppressing some of the symptoms and leaving others. The despair is mostly gone and I'm able to function, but I still have this constant sadness, anger, anxiety, and above all this sense of meaninglessness and emptiness. I'm unable to enjoy anything. It makes every day seem like forever. I often want to go to sleep just so I can take a break from existing. I feel trapped in life. Sometimes it still makes me think of suicide, though not to the extent I had before.


I'm unsure whether this means I need to up my Seroquel dosage or whether these symptoms could actually be side effects from the medication. In that case upping the dosage could only make things worse. Any advice?