Hello Mattie: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.  One forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the Survivors of Abuse forum. Here's a link:
https://psychcentralforums.com/survivors-of-abuse/
I don't think there is any personal suggestions I can offer you with regard to your situation. However here are links to 6 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of interest:
Recovering from Childhood Neglect
Are We Obligated to Care for Aging Narcissistic Parents?
5 Common Struggles Children of Narcissists Face In Adulthood
How To Heal From a Narcissistic Parent | The Exhausted Woman
https://blogs.psychcentral.com/addic...d-inner-child/
https://blogs.psychcentral.com/child...you-never-had/
I hope you find PC to be of benefit. 
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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