I wrote a long reply and it inadvertently got deleted...so, I guess, a sign from the Universe for me to be short and succinct. No matter what you do your children are going to suffer. I am sorry to say this but it is true. NO KID FARES WELL WHEN THEIR PARENTS DIVORCE. The least you can do is to be good co-parents...and speak with respect about one another in front of your kids. This is hard and you will probably fail at it a bit. But the important thing is for your kids to see you trying. It is all truly hellish...but trying to maintain respect helps. That is respect for all involved, including yourself. This worked for me.