This afternoon, my sister, brother, and I will have a video meeting with a lawyer that specializes in issues relating to the elderly. My dad. My sister found the lawyer, and from what I read he looks professional. My sister had initially jotted down some questions/topics for him, and I added a number to that list. Of course we wanted my brother to review it and add anything, but he predictably never did. I need to ask my sister to send the outline to the lawyer. The conversation needs to be organized and thorough. I'm a little nervous about it, and I'm sure my siblings are, too. Generally, I do most of the talking, because, well...I talk the most and am more used to leading meetings. I do worry my brother might get overly worked up by some topics. Throughout his life he has had intermittent explosive tendencies. Some issues relating to our father may affect him since he lives in our dad's house, and it's clear that he wishes to take it (and the property) over someday. Inheritance issues are sensitive ones. The possibility that all of our Dad's savings (and even property) could eventually be eaten up in the future, if he needed a nursing home or stays much longer in assisted living. Thus, the lawyer. It's sad that our father's cognitive state is one where us kids have to start planning. Dad may still ultimately have the final say, but he has wanted us to take over most things. He has repeatedly expressed fear of returning home and many of the usual responsibilities needed to care for himself. So many things are TBD. We really need this pandemic to end to get closer to final answers.

This is really hard and scary! When you're younger, you never think that you'll be in such a position having to help a parent. My sister has experience helping her sons. Neither my brother nor I ever even had children.