Hi,

I am currently involved in a serious relationship in which I have become extremely over-dependent. I am currently struggling through a fight with lyme disease, Bipolar II, PTSD, and social anxiety/generalized anxiety. Over the years I have become increasingly socially isolated but have maintained a close friendship with a boy from high school who I am now in a relationship with. That said, he is the one who I turn to when I am struggling, and there is no one else I can comfortably turn to - and I am going through an immense amount of struggle right now. Just having been diagnosed by a psychiatrist for my mental conditions, and being re-diagnosed for lyme disease, I am starting medications but there is little effect yet. My boyfriend has been expressing his distress at feeling trapped in a relationship where he is constantly having to take care of me and unable to get away/spend time with his other friends. He always invites me to come with him, but because of my social anxiety and bipolar I am usually too afraid or struggling with a mood swing and don't want to go. Anyways, we tried to create some more distance in our relationship so he could have more space, and I completely flipped out. I have suffered from suicidal thoughts and self-injury for some time now, but last week I felt more out of control than I ever have before. Spending so much time away from my boyfriend was so overwhelming painful to me that I began to worry that had things continued like that, I might have spontaneously attempted suicide in one of my intense mood swings where I was out of control. Without my boyfriend, I was unable to calm myself. It was terrifying.

He has agreed to support me more until the medication kicks in, and I'm doing alright... but I think last week I realized just how dependent I've become, and how terrifying, dangerous, and downright unhealthy it is to be in that situation. I know I need to wean myself away from this dependence. But how? If anybody has ever had experience with something like this and would like to tell me about it, or if anyone could just offer some advice, that would be great.