I understand you feel different to the others. We are already a big group of “creeps”. I’m also one of them.
I see how much you are struggling at work. I have been so many times in the same situation that even hurts me to read your thread.

Any possibility to seek for therapy with a profesional? (s)he can guide you in this process of acceptance, give you tools to use when you are facing to an interaction, help with learning social skills.

You know what’s more likely to happen? That you discover someone very valid in yourself but who is stuck because of this ghost of social anxiety.
There are aspects you have to consider, the only fact that not being able to focus on what it’s going on in the interaction and monitoring yourself and how you are doing it, it’s already a big burden that can make anybody to be petrified.

Let us know how you are doing it.