Hi, this is my first post so I’m not really sure about how this works but anyways. I’m here mainly because I have a fear of commitment and relationship anxiety.
I’ve realized this fairly recently since I’m starting (trying at least) a new relationship. For context, I’m female, 18 y/o and this is my first ever relationship. Other attempts in the past haven’t worked bc of my anxiety but I hadn’t realized this until now.
I’ve been going out with this guy for about two months now and everything had been going great until about two weeks ago. I started to get an immense sense of doubt and second guessing my decision of being with him. I started to overthink and kept telling myself that I was faking liking him and that I was actually trying to force myself into all of this. I’ve also started to cringe at some things he says to me, things that I used to like and made me feel good. I constantly worry he’s not “the right one” and I’m just too scared of being lonely and that’s why I’m with him. The thing is, right now it’s like there’s two parts of me constantly fighting over control of my feelings. One of them is sure that I want to be with him and have a steady relationship, and the other is telling me to get out of there and not let him get closer to me. I’m so scared I’m gonna hurt him because he genuinely cares for me, but i think I’m even more scared of letting him into my life and him leaving because he realizes he doesn’t like me.
I don’t know what to do or how to figure out what my real feelings are rather than just my anxiety speaking. All advice is welcome