hey trippinmickey, thanks 4ur reply. I know your right &I obviously think that aswell or else I wouldnt be on this website. Subconsiously im just looking for something to justify what im doing but i know thats not going to happen. You said what am i willing to loss before i see sense &the answer is i dont know...the nyt i started back on the coke 2 weeks ago my sister said to me "if i find out your still doing drugs wer finished this time for good" but even with that threat of losing the best person in my life i still cant turn down a line of coke, i dont kno what to do its like i have an angel and devil on my shoulder &i seem to be always picking the bad option.