Yesterday was rough.



I did not do either of those things, thankfully. I don’t know what I’ll do today. Just try to stay in bed again. I finally got some good sleep. Just a couple of bad dreams. Self harm dream was just about instruments, no graphic images.

Today I am not as desperate so far but I still want to do those things. I’m hurting so bad. I know it’s just depression. I don’t have any reason to go through with anything.

My therapist told me to call my local PHP/IOP which is still running virtually. I did and I have an intake on Friday. I don’t know what else to do besides go to the hospital. I’m so desperate. But I don’t want to do that because of covid. So I’m just trying to hold on until I get some new medication or the lamictal starts to work.

Hugs to everyone!