Quote:
Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25
Yesterday was rough.
I did not do either of those things, thankfully. I don’t know what I’ll do today. Just try to stay in bed again. I finally got some good sleep. Just a couple of bad dreams. Self harm dream was just about instruments, no graphic images.
Today I am not as desperate so far but I still want to do those things. I’m hurting so bad. I know it’s just depression. I don’t have any reason to go through with anything.
My therapist told me to call my local PHP/IOP which is still running virtually. I did and I have an intake on Friday. I don’t know what else to do besides go to the hospital. I’m so desperate. But I don’t want to do that because of covid. So I’m just trying to hold on until I get some new medication or the lamictal starts to work.
Hugs to everyone! |
I'm SOOOO glad you didn't harm yourself yesterday, wild! Please take care. I'm sorry you're feeling so badly. It is good that you recognize that the depression is talking. Tell it to stfu. No, really, it's like there are two little voices, yeah? The one that's trying to drag you down, and the voice of reason, the one that recognizes "this is the depression talking, it lies ". They "talk" back and forth (in my head anyway, do you know what I mean?) It's like this:
and trying to really build up the voice of reason. The one that's calling out that ol' liar, depression.
Good on you for reaching out. You're in my thoughts.
