@TishaBuv, you asked about being soooo in love with him. No, my love has waned. My feelings are changing. I am not feeling "in love" with him right now and I am not sure if I will ever get back to feeling in love with him. When I am disrespected even if on a periodic basis, it changes me and changes how I view the person. I am viewing him now from an entirely different lens: from an objective lens of "can I even be with this person?????" "do I even want to???" and "do I still actually love him?????"

So, my feelings have changed as a result of the disrespect.

I actually have pretty strong self esteem in many ways, and I think I have fairly grounded sense of self, self worth and self respect. I fought hard to develop those traits within myself, after being beaten down for years. I am not willing to sacrifice my self worth and self respect ever again -- not for anyone - and not for the sake of "love" or romance.

That's how I feel. So, now, right now I am not feeling that feeling of in love.