I came across this article that may be helpful for you to read and then sit and think about and see if there might be things in your relationship that are laid out in this article. My sharing this is not an attempt to label your wife, but more to help you sit and think about how you may be trying to fix something you can never fix and the guilt and shame you may experience when nothing you do improves your relationship.

5 Manipulative Stuck Points Narcissists Encourage In Their Victims To Keep Them Hooked