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Buffy01 · May 14, 2020 at 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton

So I have written before about a co worker at work who I want to get away from, but feel i can't because I have told her so many secrets (when I thought she was nicer) I know if she is aware I am breaking up with her -- she will spill those secrets and it will be war. We will call her nasty friend.

Then I have another friend who, despite the fact that she is nice and kind and a good friend, is unfortunately bad at her job. And her being bad puts everyone under stress. This friend was fired from her job and received a reduction in pay. But still works with us as a relief person. And though I don't think that was a surprise... to anyone, she remains adamant that no one know. But of course I had to tell people because people were pissed that she seemed to be doing less work and thus they would have been mad at her if she wasn't receiving less pay. But I feel they knew that anyway. We will call her good friend.

Long story short, they asked good person to cover for another co worker and she has been trying hard but it is a very busy place. Remember she isn't getting paid to do this job.

The nasty friend got upset with her... and sent an e-mail to the bosses complaining about her. This was really the last thing the friend who is trying needed and it made her upset. Crying upset. What was complained about wasn't anything.

I just don't feel like either of these people are my friends and I just want to be done with both. But I feel like sending an e-mail to the bosses is just out of line and bullying and the very last thing I need is a bully.

Last night nasty friend e-mailed me to say she was feeling physically ill by the stress... I just couldn't respond. We aren't even at work any longer and I am still being dragged into these things. Last week I was very busy -- I was on what is called "emergency" and I didn't call people up freaking out. I just did my job,

I want so badly just to tell nasty friend off. IN my history at work I was friendly with people I didn't like but felt I had to be friendly with and those people ended up screwing me just as bad as if we had been enemies. So I figure, why not be an enemy? Why not just get it out there and take all her power away by telling her I don't care what she does.

All I know is that for the rest of my life I want to be kind really kind and I am tired of behaving in anyway that isn't what I want.

Do you have any evidence against the friend who is a bully? Have you thought about looking for another job? What about reporting her for harassment?