Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
I was rather shocked that you don’t think what’s happening in your home is traumatizing for a young child. Anyone with any kind of training in the area of child development/child psychology, will tell you what’s happening in your house is traumatizing for your children. I can ensure you.
|
She's affected.. not traumatized. Remember, a lot of these behaviours are behind the scenes.. the gaslighting, compulsive lying, campaign smearing... etc. We've had arguments but it doesn't happen on a day to day basis.. or even weekly. Most conversations have taken place via text/email so we're not actively scaring our kids. It hasn't been perfect OF COURSE.. and we've talked about being more mindful about what we say in front of our kids. I'm also working on not reacting to his tactics. This post is how to repair damage that's already taken place.
Quote:
|
would be traumatizing for an adult, let alone a child that young.
|
Yes because I'm far more aware of what's been happening behind the scenes.
Quote:
|
I am also surprised that you don’t think you have anything to discuss with a therapist. You can simply start by describing yours and your children’s life the you described to us, current life and events from the past etc Good therapist will find things for you to work on with information provided
|
It's not that I don't think I have nothing to say. My concern is that I'll be encouraged to leave and not to expect to "change him". I'm unable to leave and I'm wanting him to make these changes for himself that will better benefit our family. He's been working through the Dialectical Behaviour Therapy workbook with his therapist plus also through the compulsive lying. It's a start. I'm trying to be patient and I think sending a 3yr old to a therapist would be traumatic for her. She has seperation anxiety.
Quote:
|
At this point I’d probably stop worrying about what your partner he does in his therapy and focus on the needs of yourself and your kids and their rights to live a peaceful life. Please do seek help for yourself and your kids
|
Ya. I don't question him about how his therapy is going at all. He volunteers information he wants to tell me.